Time is flying by….or slowing down…..what is it?

Time is such an odd trick on us.   In one moment you feel like times is slowly ticking by and then you blink and a year has gone by.

I can apply this to all aspects of my life family, work, friends, and school.

Family:

Mr. and I have been married over 13 years.   How did that happen?  I was under 21 when we started dating….hahah.   Then the life that we have built is going by so fast.  We have been in our home over 10 years, we have 2 kids who are gaining independence and our family life seems like it is just going by at lightning speed. I will not even begin to describe how fast my children's lives are going by....

Work:

I have been at my new church for over 6 months.   Some days it feels like I have been there for years and some days I feel like it is my first week.  But in the overview of life….I have been working at churches for over 6 years…..how is that?   My years as a teacher do not seem that far away, yet the group I taught when we moved here ….they will be Seniors this year…..and I taught them in 1^st grade.   So, time is passing by!

Friends:

My college friends that I text/talk with on a daily basis now….have been my friends for over  19 years.   HOW IS THAT?

My “new” group of friends that we found when we moved to the burbs in 2002….have been a part of our lives for over 10 years.

School:

This is where I feel like time is just a ticking by.   I am going part time so I have seen several groups of friends graduate, and many are away at their internships, and I am still chugging along taking classes.   I  know my timing is right for my calling, my family, and all of the people involved in my life.

The point:

My first night in United Methodist History there are about 30 people sitting in a room.   The common thread is Perkins School of Theology and a required class for ordination.   As the class introductions went on it was oh, do you know…YES…..and again, and again, and again.   The moments in our lives are very connected and the people in our lives are a

part of our story.  It became comical towards the end of class of how connected our lives really are!

Perspective:   Enjoy your time.  Love the people who are around you.  If you don’t love them at least be civil, they will most likely be a part of your life again.

Be real!

 *This one has Mom in it a lot….if you are a Dad reading this feel free to exchange Mom for Dad.  

So, for many Mommies today is a day full of emotions.   It is the 1^st day of ____________.

Here is the thing that I want to let all of us know…..whatever emotion that you are feeling is just fine!

·       To the Mom that has been crying all weekend and having a really hard time letting your kiddo walk into the school walls….I get it.

·       To the Mom that set her alarm early so there was NO WAY that the kids would be late on the 1^st day.  Then had a skip to her step on the way to school…..I get it.

·       To the Mom that slept in her “grown” kids room last night because it was so empty now that they are away at college…..I am sure one day I will get it!

·       To the Mom that is fine with summer, fine with school, and totally does not get why people care so much…..I get it!

·       To the Mom that will cry in about 2 weeks in the carpool line as she says good bye for the day…..I get it.

·       To the Mom that followed the school bus and hid behind a bush to see your kid walk into school…..I get it and know many women who have done it. 

Let yourself be you.   Don’t feel bad if you are not crying when you drop off your kid at school AND don’t hide it if you are.   The crying Mom (let’s call her Mom C) and the dancing Mom (let’s call her Mom D) are BOTH good Moms!   They just respond differently to their children going back to school.   I am sure some days Mom C is a happy when Mom D is sad.   The fact remains that they both love their children. 

So, today…..be who you are.   Be real.   It is so much easier!

If you need some words today to pray for your kids….this is my favorite back to school prayer:

Dear Gracious and Loving God,

As my children leave for school,

I pray that you will keep them in your care.

Send your Spirit to open their minds

to all that is true and beautiful and good.

Help them to see the gifts and talents

you have given them and to use them well.

Help them to grow in knowledge and wisdom.

Help them to be kind to others

and lead others be kind to them.

Give their teachers patience and understanding

and help them teach what is just and true.

Send your angels to guide and guard my children

and to keep them from all harm.

Open their young hearts to your presence

and enfold them in your peace and protection.

Hold them in the palm of your hand

and bring them home safely at day's end.

Amen.

Ouch!

Well, I woke up on Monday morning and could not move my left shoulder.

It is not how I planned to start my week.

Not only could I not move it but I was in crazy pain.

I also had to ask for help.  This is not an easy thing for me.

Mr had to help me get dressed, do my hair, and luckily I was able to do my own make up with one hand.  Who knows how I would look like if Dan did it!

Ross helping Rachel dress up

I am writing this just waiting for PT.....ouch!  I also don't look like this.....

After seeing the doctor and now and staring PT, it look like this can be fixed with some PT!  YIPPIE!

I am rambling....but the PERSPECTIVE:

Well, This week is crazy busy......like super busy.  I have zero time to stop life and be in pain.

So, I just kept going.....and had to keep asking for help......

I even had to ask the doctor to help me with my sweater.

This has made me slow down.   It has also reminded me that as much as Mr. and I have our highs and lows.....I am super glad that he is willing/able to slow down and help me get dressed!

So, I am still in pain, but it is better and I am sure in a few weeks it will just be a memory.

PERSPECTIVE:  To slow down and ask for help does more than make sure that I am dressed appropriate for work.   It humbles me.   It reminds me that slowing down is never a part of my calendar, but can be so important to me.   It brings a time to stop, a time to reflect, a time to just breath.

So, as the crazy lives of back to school begins take some time  to stop and enjoy the moments.

Staycation 2013

So, our stay-cation had been very nice.  It started with me thinking seriously about going to a hotel alone and having some "me" time.....but I counted to ten, drove around the block and came back home for the family.

We have not dipped our feet in the sand or ocean water. 

We have not look out on snow covered mountains. 

We have had some family time that involved worshiping as a family, painting the house, book reading, siting around a fire telling horrible  "scary stories", laser tagging, fishing, ATVing, ping ponging, etc.  

We are (like most families) always going.  We are usually spilt to make sure Slick gets here or Mr. D gets there.  Or someone has to work late, etc. 

It has been nice to just be a family of four.  Together.  

I miss the together time.  A new school year is about to start and when the bell rings it is almost like a starting gun/race to Christmas begins.  

This week has reminded me that we are a good team, far from perfect, but when we are together it is good.  

It might have been a little awkward at first but now that the week is over I will call it a success.

Perspective:  Don't forget how powerful it is to "fall in love" with your family again.  It helps you remember the good in all of the members and makes you stronger as a whole!  

This picture is a perfect symbol of my life.  And I love it (most of the time)!

Friends....

So, I was watching the Today show last week and they did a segment on when you need to move on from your friends.  It was a really harsh segment.   They recommended making a list of people who you spend time with most often, then next to their names put a 0, X or +.  

            0= not good or bad influence

            X= bad for you (sucks your time, always negative, etc.)

            += Good for you (lifts your up, positive influence, etc.)

My question is:  Who would really want to do this?   Don’t friendship move on as the rhythm of life moves on?  

I have friends that I never talk to but if I saw in a coffee shop we could talk for hours.

I have friends that are no longer a big part of my life but I still love.

I have friends that a no longer a part of my life for good reason.

I have friend that never return phone calls or text, but I hope they are doing well.

I have new friends, work friend, school friends, life long friends, etc.  But they are all friends.

I have family that are dear friends, and friends that have become dear family.

Some friends are a crazy important part of my life and if a week goes by and we have not talked it feels weird. 

Some friends we talk about once a month and always start like we just saw each other yesterday. 

There are a few friends that I never see anymore and it is sad, but it is life.  I know that sounds cold, but it really is in the rhythm of life.  Sometimes friend’s change and either leave you behind or just move on.

 I am blessed to have true dear friends that lift me up, bring me down, laugh, cry, listen, watch my kids, my dogs, bring me food, etc., etc., etc.I hope that I am a friend that they are proud to have and that they feel love, prayers, laughter, and that I will be there when they need me!

This blog was also inspired by this post.(sent from wonderful friend!) http://www.thehouseofhendrix.com/2013/07/16/35-things-i-want-my-daughter-to-know-about-girlfriends/

Perspective:   Life is better with people in it who you love!  Today call a friend that you miss, you will not regret the time.

How has seminary changed me?

So, I was thinking about the world this week, the terror, the hurt, the pain.   It made me reflect on my past 2 years in school and how it has changed how I view life.

Seminary is not for the faint of heart, it is a constant pull on your faith, your brain, your life.  But, I must say that it has made me weaker at times but as a whole it is transforming me into a stronger person.

I at times have wished that I would have done this about 10 years ago.  That would have given me more time for school.  But, I do think that more time for school would have given me to much time to think.   Honestly.

I am glad that my world is full.  I am glad that I am doing this schooling with a husband, with children, with friends who are outside of my schooling.  I think if I would have done this 10 years ago I would find myself trapped in a world of Theology.  I would think to much.

 I have a love/hate relationship with the time that school takes. The readings are deep and at times  rock my world.  But, I can't stay in that place.  I have the opportunity not only to be a student, but also to be a wife, a mother, and a friend, serving a local church.  It gives me perspective on what I am learning that I would not have had 10 years ago.  I get the opportunity to read things from the perspective of

•  a mother
•  a person who allows myself to questions faith and religion
•  a wife
• a friend
• a person who is currently serving a local church

These perspectives make me get of of the deep pool of theology and live my life.

Now, I am in no way saying that the students in school who are young and single are being cheated.  They are not at all.   They are doing this in the time that is right for them.

Yet,I am thankful for the study time at the soccer practices that gave me great in site of others who are not in class with me.

I am thankful for the questions and conversations that happen when I am at the baseball fields watching a game.

I am thankful for the moments when I talk with my children about faith and theology.  They keep me real.

I am thankful for Mr's perspective on my class topics.

I am glad that I am doing this when I am 36 and my life is crazy full.  It is in this fullness that I am getting so much more out of school.

Ok, I have a paper to write and I need to get it done so that I can watch a movie with my family tonight.

So, how has seminary changed me?

Simply....when I see tragedy, I also now see hope.  In darkness I see light.   Some days that light is brighter than others, but I now look for it.

P.S.- oh and I totally know the definitions of: exegesis, transcendence,apocalypticism,  Documentary Hypothesis, and so many other words that I don't really use in my 'real' life.  I also know who Bart, Kierkergaard, Aquinas, and other people who I never really knew existed.  ;-)

That @#&%#* bowling ball

So, in January I posted about my gradual (but nice and steady) weight gain.  It is 16 pounds (depending on the day and the scale....some days it is 20). See Blog Here. 

It is now March and I am embarrassed to say....I am still carrying that silly ball and with me all the time.

Let's just round it up to 20 pounds...why not?  ug.....

UG.   I have a new plan and so far this week it seems to be working.  I am counting my calories (My fitness pal) and I am walking.  So, I am just actually DOING my original plan. 

You see this became gradual progression from a work out all the time-to miss a few days, to once a week, to NEVER. I have not been at the gym in 2 months.

How?

Well you see I have the type of personality that I need to do it strong and ALL or what is the point? 

The point is that going to the gym 2 times a week is much better than 0.  (I was going 4-5 days a week. )

The point is that going for a walk is better than NOT going for a run.

The point is that I need to take care of me.  I feel icky, I don't like the way my clothes fit (most of them don't) and I really don't like pictures of me.

I had 4 people pat my belly on Easter Sunday and I don't have a cute baby in it.  I also have 3 chins in this picture. This dress is also really cute, but 2 sizes bigger than it should be.....

So, I now have a plan.  I am no longer just talking and writing about it I am doing something about it.

I will loose 2 pounds a week and by June I will be back to where I need to be.

I will do this by:

-writing down everything that goes in my mouth
-going to the gym 2 days a week (this will increase but it is my starting point)
-walking 2 days a week (this will turn into a jog, but hey got to start somewhere)
-cutting out most sugars
-being accountable with friends and family.
- I am also going to try out Yoga. :-)

Ok, so now you know.   If you would like friend me on My Fitness Pal or on Striiv (counts my steps) please do!

Perspective:   Staying healthy takes work and commitment, just as other things in my life that I care deeply about.  So, I need to give myself the time and attention that I give my family, work and school.  It really is that Simple. 

Quiet Moments

Last night I was apart of a very moving Worship Experience.   The music was grand, the scripture was grand the sermon was grand.  But, the most moving part of the service was sitting at a table of 12 and serving communion to each other.


I participated with:

• a group of 12 giggling girls that were somewhat worried they would do it wrong.  The group got very quiet during the time of prayer. It got real.

• groups of mostly strangers that passed the bread and cup around the table and became new friends with the meal.

• A young woman helping a senior woman down the steps of the church.

• children that served communion to their mother and siblings.

It was a very powerful experience for me.  I was honored to be a part of it! 

Perspective:   It was in the quiet moments of the service last night that again reminded me that those are the moments to pay attention to.  The quiet moments are the real moments that shows us the most about life, about others.  Enjoy the quiet moments....notice them!

Keeping it Real: As I was writing this Slick came in the office and was blasting Taylor Swift...I got to look at him and say, I am writing about quiet moments.....get out!  :-)

CONTROL!!!!

So, the class schedule came out for Fall 2013.  

 I became obsessed.  I read it, I studied it, I figured out that I only need 6 classes now to graduate.   I figured out that when you only need 6 classes the schedule really dictates me, I do not dictate it.  That does not go well with my “Type A” personality.  So, I found myself finding ways to obsess.   I could switch this class for that, I could do this, I could do that.   I found myself finding ways to find control.   In all honestly I gave up hours of my day/week that I can never get back.   Why?  I was searching for control.  I  took something really simple and turned it into a HUGE project.  

 This answer was simple.  I need 6 classes.  Pick 2.  Be done.

 

I find myself doing this in all aspects of my life.  I want to feel in control.  I want to make sure that life is all in order.  

 

Now, it is important to have some control and some focus, but it is also important to be able to let go and let life happen.   It is amazing when you:

- stop and talk to your neighbor even though you have laundry in side.

- drop a coffee off to a friend even though you are on your way to work (and your alarm did not go off). 

- You hug and kiss your other half when they come home even though you are busy writing a paper.

-You put down your to-do list and play some baseball even though you have never really liked the game.  

- you listen to the stranger who begins talking to you and needs someone to listen even though you are really busy and have enough friends.

- go fishing even though it is time for dinner (you might just catch a huge bull frog)

 

You know what happens? 

 You build relationships.  You let life happen.  You find your self smiling and not stressing (as much).  

Perspective: This blog entry is written for myself today.  I woke up stressed, and then had a chat with a neighbor on the way to school, I got a sweet email from a new friend, I kissed Mr. before he went to work.  I made a yummy cup of coffee.  You know what.- I already feel better about my day.  Enjoy yours.  Have some fun.  Do some work.  and SMILE!

Girl's Weekend!!!!

So, this weekend my SFA gals are coming into town and we are going to PARTY.


Now, when I say PARTY I mean: eat, get our nails done, have a nice dinner, do some shopping, and laugh until our faces hurt.

 I have known these ladies longer that I have my hubby.  We knew each other as young 18 year old's: making stupid decisions, being home sick, breaking up with boys, stressed about exams, worried about a zit on the day of a formal, etc.   At our apartment in 1997:  

1997

Yes I have on overalls and C has on a Bennie.   We are so cool.

 

We are so skinny so I had to post it and red lipstick was totally in.

We have now been at each others weddings, dried tears for each others tears through; miscarriages, surgeries, ICU, moves, the good the bad and the ugly. I can say in all honesty we find a way to laugh and be 18 year old girls just living in the dorm in most of these situation. At my wedding:

My Wedding.

But, now that we all live in different cities and we all have kids, and we all have crazy busy lives, it is so wonderful to have 3 days that are just for us. Our weekend in 2010:

2010

2011

 

And with families and some moves around the country we have missed a year or two.  But, not this year.  Nope this year begins in about 4 hours.

Every year we plan for the next year....it at this point takes a color coded excel document to make it happen.


 I will say there is something powerful about a friendship that begins in college.   We know things about each other that many of our adult friends don't know.  I am not saying they are some deep secretes that we all keep for each other, but we have been a part of each others lives for so long it is so nice just to be with people who just KNOW who you are.  

 We don't have to see each other every day or talk on the phone every week.  We have 3 days a year.  They belong to us. So, have a great weekend and call an 'old' friend and say hi!  You won't regret it!


P.S.:  I found this picture of Mr. He is super cute!  I should totally marry that guy!    :-)


P.S.S.-  This is what my boys will be doing: