Budget

How you budget your money can say a lot for who you are as a family/person.  Now, you all know that my budget is in a color coded excel spreadsheet.

Our Budget

But, that is what works for us.  The point of a budget is looking at the money that comes in and the money that goes out.

This is also different for each family.  Some families function on one income, some on two.  Some of us get paid weekly, some by weekly, and some monthly.  These are all factors that play into how you budget your money.

We are living on a tight budget.  I hope to always live on a tight budget, that means that we are watching our spending and our giving and making sure that it is in accordance to how we want to live our lives.

A tool that has really helped me see how we spend our money is mint.com.  This web site is a secure site that gives you pie graphs, email alerts, etc. about your spending.  It was an eye opener for me.  It is very easy this day and age to use your debit card or credit cards like they are just full of free money.  But, when you see a graph of where your money is really going is a great reality check.

Dave Ramsey is also a great resource.  His baby steps get you going in a positive direction.  We are working on these and after the our crazy year of things breaking we are back on Step One.  But, I tell you I am really glad that we had a savings account to get us through.  

Budgeting really stinks at times because you have to tell yourself no.  You must use self-control.

So, how do you spend your money?  What do you budget for that you feel guilty about?

Put your life and money into perspective:  Yes, Suzie Q has much more money than you.  But you have a bunch more money than Billy Joe. 

It is not the amount of money that you have it is how you choose to spend it that matters.  

John Wesley has a quote that I love about money, “Make all you can, save all you can, give all you can”.  

This puts it into a wonderful perspective.  Don’t feel bad when you work hard and get money.  Only feel bad when that money is not put into positive use.  

*I did not get and $$ to praise these 2 web pages.  They have just helped me out.

Random

http://thechive.com/2012/03/09/random-facts-you-can-use-to-impress-your-friends-55-photos/

Here are some random facts about me:

·         If my bed is unmade I will make it before I get in bed at night.

·         I have a weird dislike for gnomes. 

·         I am addicted to the Sally Hansen sticker nail polish.  I just saw they have a new gel manicure system.  Love!http://sallyhansen.com/products/nails/nail-color/salon-effects-real-nail-polish-strips

·         I talk on the phone way too much.

·         I love the E! Network. 

·         I never thought of myself as a bible nerd/scholar.  But, I am loving grad school.  Weird.

·         I can’t spell.  Most of my post will have 1-5 errors in it.  I don’t care.

·         I can’t watch scary movies- or previews of scary movies.  I don’t enjoy being scared.

·         I hated my freckles as a kid and in Jr. High I would rub Lemon juice on my skin between classes to fade them.  (I am so glad I will never have to be in Jr. High again)

·         I don’t have any cousins.  Not a one.

Perspective:  You don’t know everything about anyone.  You can assume, you can guess, but the random facts will always win out!

Weight

I said it.  Weight.  I am at a weight that is ok, not great, but ok.  I am on the higher sides of where my weight fluctuates.  But, guess what I stopped working out and kept eating.  Last year at this time I was at the gym 4-5 days a week.  If I missed a class or a work out people sent me a text.  This year:  People think I have moved. 

I know what I need to do go get back to my normal weight.  I need to eat less crap and work out.  It really is that simple.

I have simply got out of the routine.  It is no longer a ball that I worry about.  If it drops I leave it on the ground and think about it later.  This needs to change. 

Yesterday I put on 4 outfits before I walked out of the house.  This was not because I had some great meeting or some interview, it was finding something that fit right.  Well, maybe I will remember the time it takes to get dressed when my alarm goes off to go for the jog instead of hitting snooze.   

Weight….ug.  It is so simple yet finding the motivation to fix it is my issue.  I think I might just put a picture of me naked on my alarm clock and I will jump up to begin the journey back to the routine.  (This will not happen my kids do not need that memory!)

Perspective:  I am not 200 pounds overweight, I am 10 20 pounds (or 30 depending on who you ask).  I am happy with my life and unhappy with my weight.  I miss the gym.  I miss spin class.  I miss sweating.  But, I am not doing much to change it. So, who wants to be my buddy?  Who will remind me that I feel better when I sweat in the morning?  Why can’t I do it by myself?  So, do I really miss it?  *Deep thoughts by Kim*

P.S.-Tomorrow is FRIDAY!!! And I have a GNO tonight!  

Why I love having children

I feel like I am only writing about the issues that come with parenting.  I feel like I only talk about my children when I am annoyed by them or bragging about them.  It is never in the middle.  So today I am going to remember why I love being a Mom and having a family.

Starting a family was not as easy as the Mr. or I would have planned.    We got pregnant, but the pregnancies did not go to term.   Slick was my 3^rd pregnancy and I spent about 6 months of in and out of the hospital on bed rest.  Mr. Determined was our 5^th pregnancy and I was lucky to be on “house rest” the majority of that pregnancy.  (Now, perspective…I was only down 6 months. I know of people who spend the 9 months in a hospital bed.  I know of others that are not able to get pregnant.  We are blessed to have 2 kiddos.)

I am telling you this so you know that we had many emotions when we started our family.  We prayed, we cried, we got angry, we were full love and peace at times; we at times were just lost.  These emotions are similar to how it is now as a family.  

I love the fact that I smile and my kids smile when we see each other after a day at school.

I love on Saturdays the boys pile in our bed.  (Unless we lock the door to get some sleep.)

I love that hugging a child when they are happy or sad is a place of joy. 

I love knowing the true absolute love that comes with having children.

I love watching my kids become independent.  It does hurt sometimes when they don’t need me as much, but that is our jobs as parents: to prepare them to live.

I love reading with my kids.  I need to do it more.  It is both of our happy times.  (I LOVE watching the Mr. reading with our boys.)

I love learning about sports.  Did you know that baseball has umpires not referees? 

I love seeing the world with childlike eyes.  It gives old things a new splendor.

I love celebrating holidays as a family and making traditions.

I love seeing my parents with my boys.

I love sending my boys to my parents’ house and enjoying the quiet that we once took for granted.

I love talking theology with my kids.  The questions they ask are hard and lead me to new spiritual places as an adult.

Simply…I love having kids and all that comes with it.  I could use a break some days, but I will take a nap when I am 70.  Just living the dream….

The Little Things..

So, today I am going to focus on the little things.  What makes my day just that much better?  I'll post the top 10 before I go to bed.  What would I not have noticed if I was not focused on the good?!?

What are the little things for you today?  Let me know!

P.S.- I am writing this with a kiddo that is having some kind of allergic reaction to a bug bite and his eye is swelling as we speak, I totally forgot I have a paper due tomorrow, and I slept past my alarm.  I need to focus on the good b/c if not I will just focus on the annoying start of my day.

10.  I was not in the wreck that was the reason for the traffic.  I'll take traffic over the wreck.
9.  I got to hug 2 of my good friends today.  Love that.
8.  My son complained about wearing a cup.  I told him I wear a bra every day.  Get over it.  Made me giggle.
7.  The weather is just awesome.
6.  I went for a jog this am- nice time to just be.
5.  My neighbor's kiddo (my 2nd son) gave me a hug before they all crossed the cross walk.
4.  I did not get one bill in the mail today.
3.  My hubby took the morning off work so I could go to class.
2.  I made Mac-n-Cheese for dinner so all my boys were happy!
1.  I was told today, "I admire your parenting" Wow...(she was giggling as it was said, but I'll take it)

Halloween is 38 days away!

So, as soon as we had 2 kids I dressed our kids up in themesfor Halloween.  It started with a Firemanand a Dalmatian, and then I went the next step: Family costumes!!!

2009- The Scooby Doo Family (Aunt and Uncle even participated)

2010-
Star Wars
(Please note the 6 foot Yoda and 3 foot Darth Vader)

2011- Super Hero's (Mom and Dad got lazy and went with t-shirts)  

So, This year we have planned a Harry Potter Theme.  So, now it is time to figure out how to create the costumes on a budget and with limited time (see the to do list here). But, this is a family memory that i want to do as long as my boys are not protesting. 

To be fully disclosed:  Halloween is on a Wednesday night this year.  So, I (Hermione) will be in class.  I totally thought about skipping, but I have a project due in the one class and in the other it is just not worth it to miss.  But, we will go to fall festivals at church and neighborhood events where we can be our Harry Potter Family.  

On Halloween night, I will  have my hubby walk around the neighborhood with a cut out of Hermione so that Mr. Determined will not loose his mind and the Happy Pottery Theme is complete.  (He totally loves respects ignores me and all my ideas!)

Positive Perspective: 

I could be sad about missing Halloween, but this year I will let my hubby have all the joy of walking around the neighborhood as Hagrid.  He deserves to make some memories with the boys.  

Where I am really at:  I don't want to miss Halloween.  I love it.  I might just where my Hermione costume to class.  Take that Class.  *Pity Party* 

It is always the Mom’s fault.

This is in response to I don’t want to.  

Well, the kid finally talked.  He is not having a hard time at school he is having a hard time adjusting to my new school schedule.  You see I now have class on Wednesday nights.  I get home at 9:45.  This is just a little past my kid’s bed time. 

So, I am given the gift of guilt and honestly a little annoyed with this new realization.  I had it all planned:  My mom is with the boys after school.  She takes Slick and Mr. Determined to sonic for ice cream, does a piano lesson, and helps with homework.  My hubby comes home and takes over from there: scouts, making lunches, signing folders, etc.  It is not like they come home to an empty house with cereal on the kitchen table. 

So, I am filled with GUILT and with REALLY KID?

The issue that I have with this situation is I need to look at it from his perspective and my perspective.

His:  Mom is not home at night.  He loves his Grandmother and his Dad but at this point in his life Mom is the best. (darn straight)   He does not know what to do with the emotion with missing me.  So he cries.

Mine:  I don’t want to be in class until 9:00 at night.  I am at the mercy of the class schedule and my class requirements.  I have a supportive family and hubby that can take the family ball that we bounce back and forth with minimal problems.  I felt like I had it covered.  Yet he is still sad.  I get annoyed with that and I have guilt about that.  But, you know what.  He will adjust.  I will adjust and by the time I have finals he is going to be annoyed when I am home on Wednesday nights. 

At least he talked.  At least we know what is going on in his mind (at least some of it).  It is not some horrible situation that he is crying about.  He misses his Mommy.  You know, I’ll take that because in a few years he will not want to be seen with me in public.  I do dance to 80’s music without any true warning.  I am a little embarrassing.  

To do list:

Confession: Color coding things gives me a happy high.  I love excel spreadsheets, label makers, colored pens, highlighters, etc.  Just put me in a shopping mall with an Office Supply store, a Container Store, and some food rations and pick me up in a week. 

But then when I open up my computer and see this…..

I could cry.  That is a lot to do.  That is a lot of colors.  It is just to much on some days. 

But my perspective:  I dreamed of having kids and they get several colors.  I love my job it has a color.  I am really loving my time at SMU/Perkins it has a color.  I love time with family and friends, yet another color.  I love like need to visit the YMCA yet another color.The fullness of my life keeps me in balance.  When a color is missing so is my rhythm.  

So I look at it like a juggling act.  When the rhythm is good all the balls are moving in a constant motion.  Some days a ball (or 2) drops; well guess what…that is why I am juggling balls not plates.  I can just pick them up and start again.  Every day is new and full of beautiful colors.

Prayer

So, my oldest, Slick, has been sick with pneumonia for about a month.  (In this whole ‘Perspective is a beautiful thing’ focus I completely understand that this illness is just a blink in our lives.  In 5 years it probably will hard to remember the details.)  So, that being said let’s get back to the story.

He has been poked with needles lately.  It all started with one giant shot in his *ahem* back side.  This was a monster.  After he got it he just laid on the table with the quiet sobs. (I have already written about the quiet sobs, they go straight into a Mom’s heart).  And now for the past 3 weeks we have needed to go back and get blood work and chest x-rays to make sure his insides are healing up. 

Let me paint the picture for you:

Me: “Hey Slick and Mr. Determined we are going to run to the doctor after school today.”

Them: Ok. 

(Now at doctor)

Doctor:  “Ok, I am going to send in the nurse for blood work and flu shots.”

Me: “Great, let’s get this done.”

Them: ***LOOSING THEIR MINDS****   Mr. Determined just sits with all his power, “I WILL NOT get a shot.”  Slick puts his arms inside his shirt.  “They cannot take my blood.”

Me: *freeze time*

  Ok, I totally should have had some candy or money in my purse.  I had nothing.     Crap,crap, crap... I take a deep breath so that I don’t start at their level of anxiety.

Me: “Ok, here is the deal.  It all has to happen.  So let’s just calm down.”

The nurse then walked in with the tub of needles.  That did not help.

Mr. D: “You will NOT give me a shot.”

Slick: curled in the fetal position on the table.

I’ll end this with; MR. D got the nasal spray.  Slick finally gave blood.  I got a flu shot.  By the end of this appointment I was sweating and needed a nap.  I made an appointment for Slick and Daddy to get flu shots together later that weekend with the thought process that he is calmer around his Dad.

*I will let you know that flu shot with Daddy was pretty much the same story, just on a Saturday morning.*

So, yesterday was *hopefully* our final appointment for lab work.  I was NOT looking forward to 3:45 at all.  

 I prayed every day this week for Slick.

 I prayed that his anxiety would be less, that his new fear of doctors would be less, and that I would not leave the doctor’s office sweating. 

 Prayer helps me so much in situations that I cannot ‘save’ my kids from.  I could not just give my blood instead.  I could not take the shot for him.  I CAN stand and hold his hand. 

You see this is how I view my prayer life.  Sometimes you have to ‘buck up’ and do something that is difficult.  I always feel better when someone is holding my hand.  I love the peace that comes with prayer.  When I feel like I have no control prayer allows me to put it all in His perspective.  It reminds me to let go and allow God fully back into my life.  It is a gift.  I do not always have eloquent prayers.  But they are mine.  They are real. 

So, we went to get blood work.  I was prepared.  Ice-cream bribes, fun music to focus on AND constant prayers.

He did it with no tears.  When he became overwhelmed he closed his eyes and breathed (thank you to an amazing school counselor).  The first vein was not giving any blood.  He had to be pricked two times.  He was good.

I was stronger, he was stronger.  It was a proud moment. 

The Perspective:  When you are in icky situations.  Always come prepared:  bribes, candy, silly music, and prayer.  It is always better when someone is holding your hand.  

P.S.-I just got this devotion book, Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.  She has an adult and a kid devotion book.  I love it.  Now if I would just read it every day.....

Ug.

My Perspective:  *insert bad word here*  I'll let you pick one.  Most any one will work.

I don’t want to…..

So my youngest, let’s call him Mr. Determined.  He has been having a difficult time with this whole going back to school thing.  We have been “tear free” for 2 weeks and then this morning.  BOOM! 

“I don’t want to” *with the quiet sobs*.  Those of you who are Mother’s know that the quiet sobs go straight into your heart. 

This is what I wanted to do:  I NEED TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON IN YOUR BRAIN!!!  Are you being picked on?  Are you having a hard time with learning?  Are you not making friends?!?!   TALK TO ME KID!  I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO FIX THIS.

This is what I did:  Mr. Determined you have a wonderful school.  You teacher is nice, you have great friends, you are in my favorite grade in the whole wide world.  Don’t forget today you get to wear a cape to school (BTW- what boy cries on a day they get to wear a super hero cape to school!?!?)  I just keep assuring him that he is loved at home and at school.  

Just so you all know, I have talked with his teacher and the counselor.  He is doing great during the day at school.  He has friends, he is active in the classroom, his behavior is under control, etc.

My problem with this whole thing is I can’t fix it.  I am a fixer.  I don’t know why he is getting so upset.  So I can’t fix it.  That sucks. 

Perspective:

But this is what I do know.  I have taught my children right from wrong, how to stand up for who they are, how to make friends, how to get out of icky situations, to be kind to others, AND they are never alone God is always walking with them.  I have to trust that. 

So, today as I go about my day with constant thoughts of how to fix this.  I must let it go. 

So, I pray.

Ice, Ice Baby....

I love the 80's station in my car.  It has allowed me to teach my kids so many different songs.  Last night we had a lesson on the proper way to pay homage to Vanilla Ice.

Perspective:  Have fun with your kids.   Be silly.  See how many words you can remember.  I was amazed how the rhythm just flowed.

Start your day with a little Ice: Ice, Ice, Baby

Change.....

So, it is past my bed time I can’t sleep.  This is just one of those nights my brain will not turn off, so writing seems to help me out.  If you read this blog please know it is the product of my rambling brain. 

*warning*

Today was an awesome day a ‘work’.  I use the quotes because my job is more than work, it is a calling that fulfills me.  Now, to be totally honest, some days it is a job.  It is work.  But, today was a day where I got to witness the work of God and be humble enough to be a part of it. 

It was the 1^st Birthday/Anniversary of the new start church I serve.  We had a wonderful worship service and then after a BBQ that ROCKED!  I am taking good food and good people.  It is so perfect to be surrounded with a community of Christians that are real people.  We laugh, we cry, we mess up (as seen today as I said the church I served LAST YEAR in the welcome).  The experience each week is real.  

I know this blog is centered around perspective so here you go:

September 2011:

I had been serving at the new church start for about a month.  I did not know what I was doing.  I was faking it, and loving it.  But, it was a time in my life that I choose change.  Those who know me well know that I. DO. NOT. LIKE. CHANGE.  I had changed my job, I had changed my family’s rhythm, I had changed my vocational path, and I had changed most everything that was ‘normal’ to our family.  I had major guilt about this.  

(Now just so you know my kids adjusted fine, my hubby is always super supportive to my goals, and it worked out just fine.  But, it was still change and it was difficult.)

September 2012:

I have been serving at the new church start for about a year.  I got this.  I love this.  I know what I am doing more than I don’t.  I am loving Perkins, I am excited about all the ministries that are taking place at the new church. I am excited about the 1^st year birthday/anniversary.  I came home and took a nap.  I have no guilt.

This is what happens sometimes when the opportunity for change comes.

 It is scary.  It is different….

PERSPECTIVE:  It is new. It is fun.  It all works out.  Just keep on walking down the road. 

Think about this when a change enters into your life; will you allow it? Or will you shut it out?

What is the best/worst change that has happened in your life?  Would you change it now?  Or when you see it through new PERSPECTIVE is it just plain AWESOME? 

Let me know….. 

I should stop touching things!

This is my 3^rd time to start a blog.  I always get to the name and then that is allI do.  So, today I thought I would writea post and get a little crazy.  This isgoing to be focused on Perspective.  Ibelieve that perspective is a beautiful thing; it can make a wonderful day suckand a sucky day wonderful.  It is reallyall about the lenses that you view life out of. I will start with my life.

So, 2012 has been the year of things breaking.  It started with my husband.  He landed in ICU December of 2011 withbacterial meningitis.  Let’s just saythis is not how we planned to spend our Christmas Holiday season.  This was one of those hospital stays wherethe doctors avoid you because nothing they are going to say is good.   But, aLONG story very short, he came home December 26^th and was back towork by March of 2012.  It sucked.Really. Really. Sucked.  But throw insome perspective and instead of having my husband’s funeral on December 26^thhe came home and recovered.  Not so badwhen you look at it through with a different perspective.   That is full of miracles from God that I holdon to with thankful and merciful hands each day.

 

Ok, on to the things breaking. This year my AC went outon the snazzy minivan  our washer has broken twice, ourdishwasher is on its last breath, ourfridge went out, our AC unit has now sprung a leak and we have cool newstains on our celling, and the tiles are cracking in our kitchen.  I could list a few more but you get the point.  It was like anything I touched it fell apart.  Someone asked me recently,  “What lesson do you think you have learnedabout this past year?”  My first responsewas, “I need to stop touching things.”

Perspective: 

•          ICU:  Itis a scary place where I held on tight to prayers, family and friends. 

•          The Car AC: We had a car, and after tight budgeting for the next 4 years we now havea new car.

All Below:  We are lucky to have a home!!!

•          The washer: I have a Mom and a neighbor very close, I could always get the clothesclean. AND our family has more than one outfit each, so we could wait for it toget fixed.
•          The AC unit: It went out in August inTexas.  It was the ONE day that was 85degrees.  It got fixed.
•          Leak in the attic:  Well, now I just get to repaint ourkitchen. 
•          Tiles in kitchen:  Looks like we just need to start saving forsome fancy new floors.

But, overall I must say that I learned that stuff isstuff.  It can be fixed or replaced.  People cannot. 

 I am off to write a paper now.